The Battle of Cute and Deadly

Hello friends,

One of the best parts of my life right now is my gig writing at Geekdom House. On Fridays, we post fun, silly articles.

I want to present my current favourite of these, posted today: The Battle of Cute and Deadly.

Tired, old Yoda was strolling along
through the Dagobah swamp like nothing was wrong
when suddenly Mega Gnar popped out of the mist
and pummeled into Yoda with his great, big fist
Yoda force-shoved him back, Gnar landed on his feet
Gnar leapt away through the air as they both felt the heat
of a lightning bolt crashing between them on the ground
and Pikachu came tumbling through the air with the sound
of “Pika!” he cried as he zapped Gnar away
then “Kupo!” Mog the moogle chose to join in the fray
for a moment there was silence, when from out of the fog
sinking teeth into Mog’s ear was the Rabbit of Caerbannog

Then River Tam, Skull the Troll,
Reepicheep, Krtek the mole,
Mogwai Gizmo, the Duck of Doom,
May Chang’s panda and Rocket Raccoon
shouted “for Narnia!” and “Bring the pain!”
and “I can kill you with my brain.”

Killua Zoldyk sauntered in with a sigh
dodging every strike like it was easy as pie
Gizmo tried with a leap to jump on his head
Gnar was standing by a tree and looking kinda fed
Nibbler toddled in, confusion on his face
Skull the Troll aimed to smash his head in with a mace
Then Nibbler bared his teeth, they were ready to rend
And he gobbled up the group entirely. So satisfied.

The End.

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Roustabout: Making the World A Better Place The in the Dumbest Way Possible

Kurt Braunohler is a comedian I love and he did something hilarious and meaningful this last year.

He jetskiied 200 miles of the Mississippi in seven days to raise $35,000 for Heifer International.

He recorded the whole thing an it's up for free on Comedy Central's website and YouTube.

Here's the first of nine episodes, the whole thing is about an hour and you should definitely watch it.

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Bo Burnham: what

Bo Burnham's first hour-long special what has been on Netflix for around two years now and I can not think of a more fitting name for it.

I started watching it when it first came out and was immediately turned off. If you're not familiar with Burnham, he first rose to popularity on YouTube as a teenager with some wholly original, if strange, comedy. I really didn't like his YouTube stuff so I was not coming into this with high hopes.

I really didn't like what the first time I watched it, but I couldn't quite put my finger on why. I went back to watch it and it has become one of my favourite stand-up specials to listen to whenever.

To be fair, it's closer to a one-man show or performance art than conventional stand-up, but it is safe to say you won't find anything quite like this on Netflix.

He does weird joke songs like "Hashtag Deep", weird tongue-in-cheek parody poems like "I F**k Sluts", and his opening and finale bits are quasi-pantomime bits set to strangely specific music.

If you like comedy that's not traditional brick-wall stand-up, and think you have a brain that can process the difference between a stage persona and someone's real personality, i would highly, HIGHLY recommend watching Bo Burnham: what.

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A Deviation From My Standard Format

This week I'm going to post something that doesn't really fit in my blog's normal format.

I am a staff writer at a fantastic new website called Geekdom House, and this is a feature I recently wrote. 

It's something I've been trying to find a way to express for a long time, and Geekdom House gave me an outlet to do it in a way I am very proud of. Please read it and enjoy!


http://geekdomhouse.com/the-prodigal-geek/

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SNL 40

Before I get into it, here is Kyle Mooney's unaired sketch from the SNL 40 celebration, it is weird, awkward, and I'm so sad it didn't make it to air.

I was so, SO excited for the celebration of 40 years of Saturday Night Live. Obviously, I'm a huge fan, but this was going to be a family reunion for most of the important people in comedy for the last half-century.

My fear was that it may be taken too seriously, or devolve into a 4-hour comedic masturbation session. It did neither!

Every moment of this special was steeped—STEEPED—in the long history of the show's comedic voice. The so-so opening with Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake (saved by Dratch's perfect Debbie Downer and Steve Martin's impeccable timing) into a live performance from Sir Paul McCartney and Paul Simon as if to say, "That's right New York City, we're OPENING with a m*********ing Beatles song!"

Dan Aykroyd peddling the Bass-O-Matic 2150; Will Ferrell anchoring a belligerent Sean Connery, vapid Tony Bennett, and decidedly Norm Macdonald-y Burt Reynolds; Bradley Cooper trying his best to break the Polygrip holding Betty White's dentures in her mouth; Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, and Jane "you ignorant slut" Curtin hosting a Weekend Update featuring the shark at the door; it was picture perfect.

And then it got better.

Giving Eddie Murphy, Chevy Chase, and a few others their due was a great touch without derailing the whole show, but what really brought it home for me was the audition tapes.

Everyone who tries out for the show has to audition live on the stage of Studio 8H, at 30 Rockefeller Plaza in front of Lorne Michaels, the head writer and some producers. These are recorded for posterity and occasionally have been released for individuals or leaked, but they've remained largely guarded.

Seth Meyers revealed on his talk show that no one knew they were going to run the auditions package, so it was a blindside to everyone.

Seeing Gilda Radner, Phil Hartman, Dan Aykroyd, Amy Poehler, Jason Sudeikis, Dana Carvey, Tracy Morgan and all of the others in young faces and strange clothes talking nervously to a camera. None of them had any idea what was in front of them, what their next phone call from Lorne would mean for their lives. Next to the "in memoriam" reel, it was the most emotional moment of the evening for me.

I hope SNL doesn't go anywhere soon, but if it does, my ~TOTALLY LEGALLY~ download of SNL 40 will keep me warm at night.


P.S.

All the credit in the world to Mike and Dana for giving a shoutout to the crew of SNL. Norm Macdonald commented that the immediate standing ovation was not prompted at all, and was something he had never seen before in that theatre.

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Are Women Funny?

YES.

Yes they are.


It goes without saying (he says hopefully) that this is a stupid, asinine question. "Women" are no less funny than "men" are and to believe so is not only ignorant, but misogynistic.

I watched a "documentary" called Women Aren't Funny recently which is the brain-child of Bonnie McFarlane a comedian who I don't think is funny at all (having nothing to do with her lack of Y chromosome.) It sought to ask a number of professional comedians—both male and female—if women are "as funny as men."

It was not meant to be hard-hitting investigative journalism and it wasn't really all that well done. But it did show me how many comedians I once respected are misogynist ass-hats. 

An artist's rendering of the illusive "Ass-hat"

I don't have the energy to properly articulate exactly how upset it makes me when someone says "Women just aren't as funny as men." There are a number of comedians who I will not support anymore after hearing them say something like that.

Todd Glass (a great comedian) made a great point when asked to list "5 funny woman comics". Would anyone let you get away with saying "Ok, name 5 funny black comedians. They're just not as funny as white ones!" It's bullshit, frankly. 

There are certainly far fewer female professional comedians, this much is true. For the few ladies who make it their career choice, its a tough unbalanced group. Often, women won't be picked to headline because promoters know (or believe) that a male comedian simply brings more people into a club. 

I'm not going to demean anyone by listing 5 "female comedians who ARE funny" because that simply perpetuates a garbage cycle. But I am going to link to a few comedians who rank highly on my personal comedy scale. I hope you enjoy them!

Tina Fey is awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor

Chelsea Peretti: One of the Greats

Sarah Silverman delivers a heartfelt tribute to Joan Rivers

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A Very Special Episode

Hello comedy lovers, this week I want to take it down for a second. As you may have seen on the internet last week, the Bell Let's Talk campaign was going strong. The campaign is raising awareness and funds to support mental illness and the stigma too often attached to it.

Many of my CreComm friends have written amazing and honest accounts of their struggles in different areas. Check out posts on Bailey, Danielle, Raegan, Scott, and Rachel's blogs as a few of the great posts in the vein of personal mental health. 

I have not had any notable or specific struggle with mental illness, and I'm incredibly thankful for that. What I want to write about today is my struggle with being funny — or more specifically — wanting people to think I'm funny. 

Comedy has always been an escape for me. I wasn't a popular kid through most of school but I was mostly good with it. I had friends and we got along just fine. 

I've always been a "funny" person. Both my grandfathers loved telling me jokes and hearing mine. The first joke I remember from my grandpa Braun is, "How do you catch a squirrel? Climb up a tree and act like a nut!".

Not exactly Chris Rock at the Apollo but it made 4-year-old me laugh. When he passed away I shared the story and the joke at this funeral and made everyone laugh. Which brings me to the next point.

Laughter is "the best medicine" and can be therapeutic for many people. I think it's deeper even than that. There is nothing that makes me like someone more than if they laugh with me or make me laugh. Likewise, observing what makes someone laugh tells me enough about that person to make an informed decision about them.

Making a joke or trying to be "funny" is putting yourself out there, you're basically saying "do you like this?" every time. I don't expect everything I say to make anyone laugh, when someone is "funny" a 75% average for landing a joke is phenomenal.

Robin Williams' suicide earlier this year brought a lot of media attention to the confusing relationship between comedy and depression. Many notable comedians have said they got into comedy because they learned to be funny to avoid abuse. More comedians still have come out in support of Williams and discussed their own struggles. It seems like comedians who get into the business to fill some void in their life realize (sometimes too late) that making people laugh feels great, but it doesn't inherently mean you've formed a new relationship.

Louis C.K. has made millions of people laugh and feel like they know him. But he's a real person who a fraction of a fraction of those people would actually like and get along with in real life. 

Comedy is important to me. My blogs name isn't just a cute play on words — I really do take comedy seriously. It's the lens through which I observe the world. Keeping laughing. 

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